I guess I better quit
while I am still ahead..
So many times
I have announced
that this time, surely..
I was dead.

Then, yet again,
I came right back
to life..
But honestly,
it seems I fizzled out
for real this time.

At this point
it appears to me
I’m chasing shock,
at best..
or even worse..
fisting into submission
an already perished
horse.

So..
This is how my dive
into the heart
of darkness
maybe ends..
Not with a bang,
but with a whimper..
“Mistah Kurtz - he dead!”