Dear God,
why does it
have to hurt
so bad?
I tried
my darndest
to be good..
I really had.

How is it
that your ears
can listen..
yet still
fail to hear?
I howled out
in my own pain..
not because
I lost the will
to show up
for what
both of us
hold dear.

How is it
that your eyes
can look..
yet still
fail to see?
I kept my tears
from you..
just so that
the two of us
could keep
the peace.
Am I at fault
for having
my own hurt?
For my own ways
of processing
through it..
to make us work?

Dear God,
please give me
strength..
I still have faith
that you believe.
And though
I hurt so badly now..
the living still
I shall not grieve.
I shall wake up
another day
to fight..
until The Fifth One,
known as Death
lays me, at last,
to rest eternal..
once upon
a dark and lonesome
moonless night.